Who needs their family? I do!

I have had the title of this post in mind since Monday when I watched The Simpsons with DD and saw Apu sitting on top of the house, singing about his Kwik-E-Mart. It's ever so easy to pretend you don't need something but there are times when it is more beneficial to admit to the need. Apu realised this after putting on a brave face in front of the Simpson's for their trademark song and dance number. As Homer says, "He lied to us through song!". The reason for this post? It is time for me to stop pretending that I don't need my family.

My family are naturally concerned about me at the moment. I was having a bad time of it a couple of weeks ago and now they all want to check up on me and make sure I haven't lost it completely! My Mum and Step-Dad came to see us for the day yesterday and I think now Mum may stop worrying as she has seen that the kids and I are fine. My baby sister is coming to stay at the weekend and my middle sister will be coming in a few weeks time. I have spoken to my Dad but we're both as useless as each other when it comes to remembering to pick up the phone. I get my tendency to forget why I have gone into a room from him, I think. The concern is apparent though and it is much appreciated.

I've always been the more independent of the three sisters. I left home at 18, moved to university and have stayed 60 miles away from my home town for the last twelve years. I have resisted moving back even though there have been many times when I could have easily done so. Even then I always managed to justify staying away.

Now that OH will be away for long periods of time and I have given up work, I can no longer find excuses and must admit to myself that I miss my hometown and my family.

In the few months between OH receiving his joining date and leaving work, I was asked countless times when I would be moving onto base with him. The answer was always "I'm not - I'm staying here". Now that reality has kicked in however, the answer has changed slightly. I still will not be moving onto base with him (for reasons that I may explain in a later post) but it is time to move myself and the kids further north and return home.

The simplest reason for this decision is the need for support - not just for me but for DD and DS as well. When my sisters and I were little, my Mum's parents were a big influence in our lives. We spent a lot of time at their house and we have many very happy memories of the garden, the mantelpiece and the pantry! DD and DS have a variety of grandparents and step-grandparents scattered around the country and although they love them lots, it is a shame that they don't get to see them more often. I know my Mum is frustrated that she can't help me as much as she would like to and I think that she may relax a lot more when she has the kids (and me as well) nearby. The support won't just be a one way street, either. As much as we like to think of parents as invincible, they have bad times too and being closer to home will help both sides.

My sisters have wanted me to come home for many years but I have always maintained that we get along better with a few miles between us. Memories of constant arguments and one sister always being left out of things that the other two were getting up to stopped me from putting myself back into that situation. Now that we are older and (possibly) more sensible, the three of us can be the shoulders to cry on, the arms to lean on and the feet to dance with that we all need.

To my family: I love you all, I miss you and I need you. I'll be home soon xxx